With arguably the dirtiest pitch in baseball and the ability to pitch inside, Mariano has broken hundreds upon thousands of bats in his career. With this in mind, the Twins gave Mariano a rocking chair made out of broken bats and called it “The Chair of Broken Dreams.” I love it. It’s as creative as he is legendary. It’s also almost like a hilarious backhanded compliment. Like, “Hey Mariano, you dominated us and broke nearly a forest worth of wood against us, but since you’re retiring and that means you’re old, here’s a rocking chair.” It’s literally the perfect chair for him to sit in next to his larger than life painting.